“Private Meets Public”

©1991 Gail Lois Jaffe, Gouache on paper

I have been fascinated with our Private Selves, and our Public Selves for a long time. This painting is from 1991. Now, it seems especially relevant. How will our New Private Selves, meet our New Public Selves as we navigate back into the world again? There have always been some overlaps, separations, and some distortions between our private and public selves. I have been honored to meet people’s genuine, authentic selves over my years as a therapist and healing practitioner.

The past 15 months have really magnified the relationship between our private and public selves. We have navigated so many changes. Our personal relationships have been challenged and put to the test. As our relationship to our own lives have changed, so have our relationships to others.

Professionally, I have seen marriages and friendships being tested. Personally, I have noticed friendships being tested. Some got stronger, some lost contact, and some ended.

What I’ve concluded is that it became clear to me if a friendship was of the path, or of the heart. If it’s of the path, and the path (situation) changes and it became inconvenient, or demanding, and respect and appreciation diminished, the friendship didn’t survive. If it’s of the heart — the friendship grew to make room for inconvenience, extra effort, mutual respect and consideration to insure all parties involved were comfortable with the choices made to stay in touch. The friendships then were intact and even thrived. New friendships and colleagues were introduced in on-line meetings including people all over the country and the world. These have been amazingly important and fulfilling for me.

While the relationships were undergoing changes, our private selves were reevaluating what’s important, true, meaningful, and authentic — and what our genuine needs and preferences actually were. How do we choose to spend our precious time, energy? What are our needs for privacy? For socializing? What do we truly enjoy?

To summarize — as we have thankfully survived this intense reckoning during our long seclusion — how will we walk our precious private selves, back into the social, public arena with our essential selves intact, with our hearts open, and with discernment about how to proceed forward?

Please feel free to schedule your free 15 minute consultation to see how I can assist you with your reentry :)

Here’s to wise and joyful choices in the days to come.

Happy July — see you in August!

Love,

Gail